Those two sentences were my prayer for 2008. I began praying those sentences January 1, 2008. If I'm honest, it was probably the first time that I ever really prayed for something so open-ended, and at times it was pretty scary. I had no clue how God was going to answer my cry for deep faith...was He going to bring sickness to me or a loved one, was He going to ship me off to another country, was I going to have to leave a job I loved...I had no clue what He was going to do, but I knew that it was time to take my faith to another level.
I began praying for big faith like I've never prayed before. I prayed daily---and more than just in the morning and at night. I journaled often. It took a few months, but in time the Lord began to remind me of a passion and desire that I had had in my heart for years...a passion and desire to minister to young women. Now, remember...I'm new to these open-ended, asking big type of prayers. I didn't see how my plea to have deeper faith and my passion to minister to young women really went together. Three words...I WAS WRONG.
As I prayed and asked others to pray...if you're reading this, then you probably fall into that category, and I can't tell you enough how thankful I am for your prayers and support...I could sense the Lord pulling me away from my current job that I LOVE to do something else. It's funny, I didn't know where He was going to put me, but during that time of prayer, I realized that sometimes you just have to step out in FAITH. So, I met with my boss and told him that I had no clue what the next step really looked like, but I knew that if I stayed where I was, I would not be following the Lord's will. I got some crazy looks from people as the word began to leak out that I would be leaving my job, especially during this economy. For the past year and a half, I have worked in the marketing department for Chick-fil-A. Yes, that would be the company has a mission statement that starts with the words "To glorify God." AMAZING company. I'm forever grateful for the people I met and the projects that I got to work on, but I know if I am following The Lord, He will provide.
It looks like this blog is getting long...I'm normally not for the long posts...but as I was reading over what I wrote, I realized that it sounded like I spent the past year following the Lord without any hesitation. Let me be the first to say that when I woke up each morning, I wasn't always saying "I Surrender All." I wrestled with God during each stage.
Do I really have to leave a job I love with people I love, especially if I don't know what I'm going to do? I know, God...how about I just lead a small group for girls! No, scratch that...how will I be able to minister to young women when I am still struggling with many of the issues they struggle with? How am I going to be able to pay my bills? God, I think you have got the WRONG girl for this job!
So, there you have it. My last day is TOMORROW. Starting next week I will be a nanny...another post for another day, but I am SO EXCITED about that! I have 100% NO IDEA where I am going to be 7 months from now when my lease runs up. Normally, that would totally freak me out, but the peace I have is beyond measure. Maybe that's because I've learned that when you choose to chase after God, He will chase after you with His blessings.
I'm so thankful that last January I decided to pray for big faith. I'm so glad that I decided for the first time in my life to really, REALLY let the Lord have 100% control.
I know that was long, but I felt like I had to get it out there. You probably don't remember it since you read it about 10 minutes ago :), but the second part of my plea was to deepen the faith of others. The best way I know to do that is to share my story.
I pray that the Lord will show you what it feels like to have big faith. Prayers and blessings!
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" -Isaiah 6:8